The blood work that the doctor who does not suck did came back perfect – except for one thing. Lupus ANA: positive.
We knew it was some sort of auto-immune going on but I had my money on rheumatoid arthritis. Shaun and I had been joking all week that if it came back lupus we were going to shit bricks. So, it came back lupus.
LJ ended up shitting the brick, though. Seriously, the turd I had to save the toilet from was the size of an orange. That’s bigger than my fist! I’ve never known such huge turds could come out of such little people.
Anyways, yesterday I forgot my face care routine. I got out of the bath and stood there staring because I knew I did something next but couldn’t remember what. This is why OCD exists – it’s so that when your brain fuzzes out, you know where everything is. Mess up the routine and you end up forgetting to tone then moisturize.
I had to postpone the cardiologist appointment (due to lupus) and the appointment person said “bless your heart.” I wonder if she sees how cute that is, working at a cardiologist and stuff. It’s probably good though. It was starting to settle in that I may end up with a pacemaker (due to neurocardiogenic syncope) and I was starting to freak out. MVP is the most annoying disease you’ll never die from, but that possibility is crazy.
My dad tried to tell me once that I was adopted and I just laughed. I’m his daughter all the way from the beautiful but near-sighted eyes (our prescription are the same) to the places we hurt. He’s had serious kidney problems since his early 20s, so now my mom is asking that he be tested for lupus too. It may be good, again, I never had any genetic children. I seem to be a genetic mess of problems.
So, what now? From what I can tell, not much will change (due to lupus) except that now we have a new joke. Take pills, lay down when hurting or tired, and do what I can on good days. Read to take my mind off of the pain. Grab life by the balls and live it.